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Journal of Social and Personal Relationships
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An Individual Difference Explanation of Why Married Couples Engage in the Demand/Withdraw Pattern of Conflict

John P. Caughlin

University of Illinois, Urbana

Anita L. Vangelisti

University of Texas, Austin

Demand/withdraw is a pattern in which one spouse nags or complains while the other spouse avoids or withdraws. Given the fact that demand/withdraw has been repeatedly linked to marital discord, it is important to understand why couples engage in such a seemingly dissatisfying conflict pattern. Although several scholars have suggested that power differences between men and women lead to demand/withdraw, the research reported here focused on an alternative explanation: That individual differences are important contributors to demand/withdraw communication. In particular, two models connecting individual differences to demand/withdraw were examined. The first model, a self-influence model, suggested that individuals' attributes primarily affect their own communication behaviors. The second model, a relational influence model, posited that individuals' characteristics affect the extent that the couple (i.e., both partners) engages in demand/withdraw. Results supported both the self-influence and relational influence models. These findings imply that individual differences do contribute to demand/withdraw and suggest that there is a need for future research to investigate the exact nature of the association between individual differences and the demand/withdraw pattern of marital conflict.

Key Words: conflict • demand/withdraw • individual differences • marital interaction

Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, Vol. 17, No. 4-5, 523-551 (2000)
DOI: 10.1177/0265407500174004
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 Communication ResearchHome page
D. J. CANARY, W. R. CUPACH, and R. T. SERPE
A Competence-Based Approach to Examining Interpersonal Conflict: Test of a Longitudinal Model
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[Abstract] [PDF]